History of Feminism

redqueen

(115,164 posts) Fri Dec 20, 2013, 11:56 AM Dec 2013

So I was talking about porn with some young women ... (WARNING! This is a HoF thread!) [View all]

And they were saying some of the same things I've seen posted here -- how uncomfortable they are around men, wondering if abuse porn or rape porn or rosebud porn is something the guy jacks off too, etc.

And it hit me that we see all these complaints from men who can't get dates, who have no success with women, and these guys are probably entirely clueless about just how many women have giant walls of doubt and suspicion built up. Not just because of misogynist porn (let alone the violent kind) but also the amount of women who've either known other women who were involved with abusive men or were abused themselves, the amount of casual sexism and misogyny that we all see every day, that they probably don't even notice or even participate in themselves...

Anyway I just thought it was interesting, and given the similarities between what some of them were saying and what women here have said.

Also: If you don't know what rosebud porn is, I would advise you DO NOT GOOGLE ROSEBUD PORN. Someone in the discussion did and ... I'm just glad I didn't. I'll just leave it at that.

108 replies

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Highlight:

So I was talking about porn with some young women ... (WARNING! This is a HoF thread!) [View all] redqueen Dec 2013 OP

(WARNING! This is a HoF thread!)... lmFao. accommodate my ass. now, i will read. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #1

I'm taking responsibility! redqueen Dec 2013 #2

It is your duty after all! xulamaude Dec 2013 #5

ya, well, did you? i challenge that. i see no note telling eveyrone to NOT rec. hey wait.... seabeyond Dec 2013 #6

Fuck no I won't try to protect their precious eyes. redqueen Dec 2013 #33

dont know that i saw. probably. i know she did a funny. ya, fuck it. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #34

Bwahahahaha ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #57

Yeah, but I'm rec-ing anyway! Even though I'm not supposed to. Squinch Dec 2013 #70

Rosebud Porn??? ... 1StrongBlackMan Dec 2013 #3

Yeah, I'll send you. a PM. redqueen Dec 2013 #8

Okay ... 1StrongBlackMan Dec 2013 #10

It's really nasty 1Strong JustAnotherGen Dec 2013 #36

please PM me or I will HAVE to google it. I can't just let that alone, rq. Tuesday Afternoon Dec 2013 #11

Ok... redqueen Dec 2013 #19

I am in wound care. Tuesday Afternoon Dec 2013 #21

Some of the women in my radfem groups are nurses... redqueen Dec 2013 #22

oh yeah ... it takes a lot to gross me out. that is why when I think: Tuesday Afternoon Dec 2013 #25

Yep redqueen Dec 2013 #28

exactly. - Tuesday Afternoon Dec 2013 #31

"I suspect you of baffling them with bullshit" xulamaude Dec 2013 #41

Oh, my god! It's about certain stomas? Squinch Dec 2013 #72

No, not a certain type of stoma... redqueen Dec 2013 #91

I looked up the urban dictionary. Ugh. Squinch Dec 2013 #92

I'd guess it has to do with deflowering a virgin BainsBane Dec 2013 #66

I was just going to google it MuseRider Dec 2013 #4

I hope more women speak up about these things. redqueen Dec 2013 #12

dines heard it across the nations at colleges, years ago. attacked as dworkinnite. voice silenced. seabeyond Dec 2013 #14

generally speaking, just about every man is going to have some exposure geek tragedy Dec 2013 #7

Well said. redqueen Dec 2013 #13

I don't know how old you are, but sadly I think many of your assumptions about younger folks nomorenomore08 Dec 2013 #97

Going through dry stretches doesn't turn people into MRAs, thankfully, otherwise geek tragedy Dec 2013 #98

Ha! That's a good one. I'll bet they'd like to think they really have that much support, though. nomorenomore08 Dec 2013 #101

my youngest niece said no to porn. if man does porn, she does not do him. my oldest niece seabeyond Dec 2013 #9

Your boys will be grateful men some day. nt geek tragedy Dec 2013 #15

works both ways and we already are, lol. but, ya. they are only beginning to see all the seabeyond Dec 2013 #16

The saddest thing about this, to me, redqueen Dec 2013 #17

i dont know redq, just seems like that is not doing our job. i had a mother tell me.... she has to seabeyond Dec 2013 #20

I agree, it's a complete abdication... redqueen Dec 2013 #23

nothing bothers me. all conversation, and thinking is a must, is welcome. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #29

I think that a lot of mothers haven't a clue as to what's going on xulamaude Dec 2013 #27

Clearly we need millions more radical feminist moms! redqueen Dec 2013 #30

but. and i agree. i was 33 and 36. but, part of parenting is being informed. i like to be a step seabeyond Dec 2013 #32

Exactly, they've been told for decades that porn is great! All consenty and awesome! redqueen Dec 2013 #37

This. CrispyQ Dec 2013 #50

My family thought itself pretty hip and artsy xulamaude Dec 2013 #59

At some point ... would this be a good film to discuss ... Tuesday Afternoon Dec 2013 #18

Definitely. redqueen Dec 2013 #24

I have no doubt ... I, for one, would be interested in the Tuesday Afternoon Dec 2013 #26

Rec #5 JustAnotherGen Dec 2013 #35

you're ornery. i LUV... lol. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #38

And full of mischief JustAnotherGen Dec 2013 #39

i have done this already, but think it appropriate for you too, and a fav. seabeyond Dec 2013 #40

I thought it took 10. Did it change? Tuesday Afternoon Dec 2013 #42

glass flowing over, on its way, wink. lol. ya. 10. seabeyond Dec 2013 #43

Look JustAnotherGen Dec 2013 #44

i had it whispered, but... seabeyond Dec 2013 #45

First thing I DID was google rosebud porn. ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #46

Outstanding post. --nt CrispyQ Dec 2013 #53

Exactly. It's not the "sex" part that's the problem, never has been. It's everything *but* the sex nomorenomore08 Dec 2013 #99

+1000 smirkymonkey Dec 2013 #105

Pro-tip Google "Urban dictionary rosebud" intaglio Dec 2013 #47

For what it's worth I suspect that live porn of all sorts may be dying intaglio Dec 2013 #48

Yes ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #49

I've always thought that the best body mod for a man intaglio Dec 2013 #51

Well, It could have its advantages I suppose ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #54

I can't say the idea really grabs me. Jackpine Radical Dec 2013 #61

... ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #86

I got no clue what rosebud porn is-- Jackpine Radical Dec 2013 #52

lol lol. i hear ya, dude. nt seabeyond Dec 2013 #55

Put it this way ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #56

I thought Rosebud was a sled. Jackpine Radical Dec 2013 #58

It's better this way ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #60

There are a couple of 'clues' in this thread that can xulamaude Dec 2013 #62

I don't want to know very badly. Or at all. I'm not into gross. Jackpine Radical Dec 2013 #63

... ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #64

I have my own gross interests BainsBane Dec 2013 #76

This is kind of interesting. I wonder how many of us who frequent HoF are medical professionals. Squinch Dec 2013 #79

I'm not BainsBane Dec 2013 #81

I'm having a little chuckle here: Squinch Dec 2013 #82

What's even worse BainsBane Dec 2013 #85

Which is more fun? Squinch Dec 2013 #87

Yeah, that's where it's at BainsBane Dec 2013 #89

That's always been an accurate indicator for me. If I say I'm going to be somewhere at a given Squinch Dec 2013 #90

Same here. No matter how attracted I am to a man in the beginning, if he proves himself over time smirkymonkey Dec 2013 #103

that would be the point. too many of us do not want to wallow in the sewer and those in it want all seabeyond Dec 2013 #65

. Squinch Dec 2013 #78

It's so bad no one can even say what it's about? BainsBane Dec 2013 #67

Well I can I'm not shy ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #68

again, the whole point is "sex" without any satisfaction for the woman BainsBane Dec 2013 #71

Exactly ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #83

I truly don't see how any of this is arousing. I've seen tons of explicit material but I hate nomorenomore08 Dec 2013 #104

Or that was my other choice... xulamaude Dec 2013 #73

A Jackpine Radical Dec 2013 #93

RQ will please correct me if I'm wrong but: xulamaude Dec 2013 #69

That is totally different from what Ism just said BainsBane Dec 2013 #74

See my above... nt xulamaude Dec 2013 #75

I know about such things ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #80

Either, or - normalized as kink... xulamaude Dec 2013 #84

I don't think that people think of the physical damage ismnotwasm Dec 2013 #88

If you look at the text descriptions, redqueen Dec 2013 #96

Explanation below (you've been warned) redqueen Dec 2013 #95

guys like to pretend this is out there shit. it is not out there shit. this stuff is the norm seabeyond Dec 2013 #100

Oh man, that is just sick! smirkymonkey Dec 2013 #106

Thank you for your clarification - xulamaude Dec 2013 #108

Citizen Kane is all I can think of.... boston bean Dec 2013 #77

As in #58 above. Jackpine Radical Dec 2013 #94

Well, Google is a bad idea for a lot of stuff Warpy Dec 2013 #102

Sad world, when people can't even get together in the most basic human ways... nomorenomore08 Dec 2013 #107