I always thought it was just a great way to keep a marriage healthy. Big ass marine, 6 foot 3 and still mostly muscle with only a small beer padding, not even Dad Bod. Making her the boss balanced out the power and made him the enforcer. Good way to be "off duty" at home. Or just still following orders, I guess.
My Dad was Army and was DAV from Korean Conflict (lead up war/battle to Vietnam). Got shot up the spine when his parachute got him stuck in a tree. He got evac and into body cast for a year and a half... back then spinal fusions were a "new" thing.
He still made sure we knew MOM was boss.
One day Mom was planting a NO GO Flag on my request to ride my bike to a small shopping center. I didn't think it would be a big deal because it was 3 blocks from my JR High that I walked to M-F. But I guess they were worried about the bike getting stolen. That part is foggy now, but being a grownup it seems to be what makes sense.
ANYWAY, I made the mistake of saying MOTHER! in a loud voice because I was amping up to go into my spiel about how the shopping center was only 3 blocks from my school and DAD took offense to my TONE.
"You watch your mouth, with your Mother, girl. Or you will be picking up your teeth in Cincinnati." We lived in California at the time.
I was always more afraid of Mom than Dad, but I didn't doubt his sincerity even though he rarely even spanked us. Didn't have to, their rules were basically fair and we got at least a warning to knock off whatever we were doing wrong so we learned to stop mid-stride if need be.
But still makes me wonder why that's a military thing.
My Hubby is great and he's a civilian. We are more "partners" but I think I am a bit more "tough" in some ways. Grew up in nasty neighborhoods and had to fight my way out of gang business. Hubby was more sheltered. He's got the guns, but isn't apt to run around busting heads. If we get a noise in the middle of the night, it's me that grabs a bat and goes to check it out.
Hubby does rule the finances, the remote and gets the cars bought and/or serviced. He rules the lawn and knows to leave my flower beds alone. Been together over 30 years. So far so good.
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