Cosplayer Nicole Jacobs On Harassment At Comic Cons… And What We Can All Do About It

[el_bryanto]

This is from Bleeding Cool.

After being asked for a photo, a man squeezed my butt before leaving. After consenting to another photo, a man barked at me “come on, pretty kitty, gimme a smile to think about later”. My favorite (sarcasm) comment was the “whoa there girl, does that ass have a boyfriend?” I’m not sure why, but something about a woman in spandex on the con floor meant to these people that she has immediately, intentionally relinquished her rights as a person. The cost of her ticket and time, the work and love she poured into her costume, its all nullified because her presence is simply assumed as being solely for audience appreciation, and entirely at their disposal. However, at the time, I never realized how incredibly wrong this was, that I was allowed to say “no”. Years of being told to “grow a thicker skin”, years of continuous emotional and verbal battery from society reiterating the lack of my self worth unless a man find me desirable, men laughing off my visible disgust at the nasty catcalls and comments with “easy, baby, you should take it as a compliment!”, these all conditioned me to be complacent and silent. To take this very real harassment and explain to myself that it’s ok, it’s “just boys being boys”. But at what point do we finally hold our boys – and more importantly ourselves – accountable?

. . . We cannot laugh at reports of harassment, at rape jokes or gender inequality jabs. We cannot stand idly by as scores of our peers are giving up on a world they love because it simply isn’t safe anymore. I saw female friends of mine called “slut” and “whore” for giving an incredibly accurate representation of a costume, a costume glorified on the comic book pages, and yet scandalized because it’s on the con floor. Callie Breusman wrote “[behavior such as this] encapsulates the absurdity inherent in how our culture conceptualizes propriety. We’re taught to think that women’s bodies are by definition impure and that displaying them is automatically salacious and obscene.” Men have called me “frigid bitch” for refusing to kiss them in pictures, have asked if I “really thought [my] boobs were big enough to pull that costume off”. These words enforce the idea that my body is not my own, and that by simply being a woman in public, I am inviting the criticism and sexual attention of those around me.

I am a bit hesitant in posting two articles about geek culture in two days - but I really liked this article. I particularly appreciated how it had a set of concrete steps one can take to deal with the situation at the end, and talked about what some (but not enough) conventions are doing to create a safe space.

Bryant

[intaglio]

1. This has been going on for years - and that is no excuse

Before it was called "cosplay" they were fancy dress competitions as science fiction and fantasy conventions where the female participants were routinely harassed.

[theHandpuppet]

2. Yep. It could/can get really ugly.

At one sci-fi convention I attended the organizers thought it would be funny to hold a "slave auction" for charity. I kid you not. Thankfully enough of us raised holy hell to quash that!!

[el_bryanto]

3. There's something really messed up in that culture

It's not across the board thank goodness - but a sort of sense of entitlement crossed with a real discomfort with the presence of woman can create a toxic atmosphere.

My Gaming Group was predominantly female for a few years and it was very educational.

Bryant

[ismnotwasm]

4. I like geek culture

And the pushback against this kind of shit is amazing