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sufrommich

(22,871 posts)
Mon Mar 10, 2014, 06:52 PM Mar 2014

Ban Bossy. Words Matter.



Forgive me if this has already been posted,if so I didn't see it. My Mom just sent me the link and I love the message.

When a little boy asserts himself, he's called a “leader.” Yet when a little girl does the same, she risks being branded “bossy.” Words like bossy send a message: don't raise your hand or speak up. By middle school, girls are less interested in leading than boys—a trend that continues into adulthood. Together we can encourage girls to lead.

I love that the Girl Scouts are part of this too.

http://banbossy.com/#
13 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies

Warpy

(113,130 posts)
1. We've got enough banned words here, thanks
Mon Mar 10, 2014, 07:08 PM
Mar 2014

Keep banning words you don't like, we'll have to communicate in smilies.

I've heard "bossy" applied to both sexes. The few times I've heard it applied to women who were doing their jobs, I've spoken up. In spades..

Words matter but banning them on DU is slacktivism. Objecting to them when they're misapplied in real life takes real courage, but it will get you a lot farther.

 

seabeyond

(110,159 posts)
3. ya. and i want to watch the video. i recognize it so strongly with my two nieces on another side,
Mon Mar 10, 2014, 07:16 PM
Mar 2014

and a little 6 yr old now. i am working on it cause she is bossy, .... but, i do encourage her to speak out, and pat her on the back when she thinks... and speaks out. so i hear what you are saying.

gonna watch video in a bit.

 

LanternWaste

(37,748 posts)
13. Interesting and imaginative allegation...
Fri Mar 14, 2014, 03:11 PM
Mar 2014

"the few times I've heard it applied to women who were doing their jobs, I've spoken up. In spades..."
Interesting and imaginative allegation...


" but banning them on DU is slacktivism..."
Regardless of your trendy word use, you then believe and ay and all word, regardless of meaning or intent, should be in use on DU?

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
4. am I going deaf or do those first couple of girls need to enunciate better?
Mon Mar 10, 2014, 07:33 PM
Mar 2014

Anyway, I understand the intent. Words do matter. Study vocabulary. Learn to use better words. Do not be afraid of being called words that can hurt instead turn it around.

Bossy has a bad connotation no matter the gender. Micro-Manager comes to mind in the business field.

Synonyms are our friends:
authoritarian
overbearing
controlling
oppressive
commanding
tyrannical
imperious

More words related to bossy
arbitrary
absolute
autocratic
bossy
despotic
dogmatic
domineering
downright
flat out
high-handed
imperious
magisterial
monocratic
no ifs ands or buts
no joke
overbearing
peremptory
straight out
summary
tyrannical
tyrannous
arrogant
aloof
assuming
audacious
autocratic
biggety
bossy
bragging
cavalier
cheeky
cocky
cold-shoulder
conceited
contemptuous
cool
disdainful
domineering
egotistic
haughty
high and mighty
high-handed
imperious
insolent
know-it-all
lordly
on an ego trip
overbearing
peremptory
pompous
presumptuous
pretentious
proud
puffed up
scornful
self-important
smarty
smug
sniffy
snippy
snooty
snotty
absolute
all-powerful
czarlike
despotic
dictatorial
domineering
driving
monocratic
pushing



ismnotwasm

(42,443 posts)
7. It's a message little girls hear far to often
Wed Mar 12, 2014, 11:28 AM
Mar 2014

There already people making fun of this campaign, and while I'm not sure how much it will change gendered language-- using a relatively benign word like " bossy" is actually a very good idea as it starts so young, and it will definitely get conversations going

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
11. yes, I understand all that. What I am saying is the first two girls in the video sound garbled to me
Wed Mar 12, 2014, 11:54 AM
Mar 2014

I did not understand a word they said, by the third girl I heard and understood.

I am speaking to the technical aspects of the video itself.

The message is loud and clear already.

There is bossy and then there is BOSS.

Be a Boss but, don't be bossy.

Be a Leader if that is where the natural talent is. Not everyone is meant to lead.

mercuryblues

(15,077 posts)
5. I have
Wed Mar 12, 2014, 07:49 AM
Mar 2014

a sign hanging in my kitchen....

I'm not bossy
I just have better ideas.

even though the word bossy itself has negative connotations, the phrasing often used is even more troubling. "Don't play with her. she's too bossy" Instead of giving the girls the social skills to get along it is ostracizing a child for having a strong personality. It is also the beginning of pitting girls against each other.

A standard reply should be: You say that like it's a bad thing.

redqueen

(115,164 posts)
6. Thanks for posting this.
Wed Mar 12, 2014, 09:20 AM
Mar 2014

It's getting a great response and most people do seem to recognize that the word is far more often used to marginalize girls who show any kind of initiative during their early years.

I was thinking this should be posted in GD but based on how it went here I'm not so sure.

sufrommich

(22,871 posts)
8. I don't get it either,it's a program aimed at
Wed Mar 12, 2014, 11:29 AM
Mar 2014

young girls for fucks sake,that's why the Girl Scouts are involved. I guess the Girl Scouts have become part of the evil "radfem" cult now on DU.

ismnotwasm

(42,443 posts)
10. There are, no doubt, secret infiltrating Girl Scout's trolling DU
Wed Mar 12, 2014, 11:32 AM
Mar 2014

Because selling cookies just isn't enough anymore

Seeking Serenity

(2,930 posts)
12. I disagree with this campaign
Fri Mar 14, 2014, 10:19 AM
Mar 2014

I don't see, have never seen, "bossy" as a sex-specific term. As I remember from my growing-up years and from my middle-school boy's experiences, boys can and are labeled as "bossy" just as much.

Bossiness, to me, comes from when people, male or female, insist on compliance with their ideas or their ways of doing things from someone else when they don't have any authority to demand such compliance. Think the character Sheldon Cooper from TBBT. He is definitely bossy because he demands the group do things his way, even though he has no authority to insist compliance, and then he sulks when he doesn't get his way. No one I know would call him a "leader;" he's just bossy.

Even those in authority, that is, the boss, can be bossy, male or female. It all comes down to HOW they exercise that authority and that knows no sex restrictions. My husband works under a female administrator. She is the boss; she can tell him what to do and he does it. But he doesn't describe her as bossy because she doesn't lord it over him. She is a leader and he respects her as such. But any boss, male or female, can be bossy if they exercise their authority in a kind of dictatorial, despotic way.

So, I respectfully disagree.

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