History of Feminism
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Seemingly infinite patience writing about the conversation of survivors in the context of the Dylan Farrow media bashing. This is a conversation I have largely stayed out of because I do not have the eloquence or patience needed to refute the stupidity I've been seeing.
That said, I do want to give a trigger warning. She writes briefly, but openly about her experience and that may be hard to read.
http://www.feministhulk.net/3/post/2014/02/how-to-like-woody-allen-on-facebook.html
cinnabonbon
(860 posts)But, you might ask, isnt the mudslinging going both ways? Shouldnt the same standard be held to those attacking Woody Allen? Questions like that, while perhaps well-meaning, assume a symmetry in this debate that simply is not there. Woody Allen is in a position of power to which his accuser will never have access, and critiques of his character move against the grain of enormous cultural pressure, whereas the judgments made on Dylan Farrows language, memory, and self are supported by a larger social framework that shames and silences survivors of sexual abuse and assault. To put it more simply, we live in a culture whose social (not to mention legal) structures make dismissing a survivor incredibly easy, and confronting a predator nearly impossible.
Tuesday Afternoon
(56,912 posts)Be humble about the limitations of your good intention. If someone is hurt or triggered by your words, it isnt because they failed to understand your intentions. It is because your intentions dont have the power to shape the meaning of your words in the larger social world. For an excellent description of the problem of intention, see @chescaleighs video Getting Called Out: How To Apologize.
redqueen
(115,164 posts)but I do want to watch this later. Thanks for posting it.
Tuesday Afternoon
(56,912 posts)Last edited Wed Feb 12, 2014, 10:34 AM - Edit history (1)
just because I am not offended does not mean that it is not offensive to others.
Their feelings are just as relevant as mine.
Respect.
It works both ways.
I respect their feelings and, try to alter my behavior accordingly.