Seniors
Related: About this forum25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP
Sigh...
25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP
1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up"
and "break up."
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police because
those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You take naps.
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date
instead of the beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would
severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid,
not condoms and pregnancy tests.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine
is no longer "pretty good shit."
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces
"I'm never going to drink that much again."
23. 90% of the time you spend in front
of a computer is for real work.
24. You drink at home to save money
before going to a bar.
25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you
congratulate them instead of asking
"Oh shit, what the hell happened?"
Bonus:
26: You read this entire list looking desperately for one
sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old butt.
dixiegrrrrl
(60,011 posts)You remember when waking up stiff was a GOOD thing.
babylonsister
(171,570 posts)sinkingfeeling
(52,962 posts)Patrick57
(11 posts)27. Watch the TV with a blanket over you, firstly to save on heating costs and secondly because nobody can see you because you don't get any visitors any more.
RebelOne
(30,947 posts)MzNov
(18,531 posts)but do catch an awfully high number of "Golden Girls"
SheilaT
(23,156 posts)and I'm beginning to lose patience with all my same age friends who fall asleep at 8 or 9pm. What's wrong with them?
I also can eat anything at any time of day or night and it does not upset my stomach. What is wrong with all of you whose tummies have gotten so delicate?
I'm 65, apparently not yet an adult.