Managing

[Schlocko]

Hi, I’m a middle-aged suburban Dad with no real problems except for inheriting a depressive disorder from both parents. (Hip hip hooray, DNA!) Does anyone else feel like they have two brains sometimes, an anxious one and a serene one? I’ve been depressed since a sleepless, nauseous Election Night. (Hip hip hooray, USA!) But sometimes, I’ll be cheerful and productive while still battling sh!tty, invasive thoughts. Might be the meds, might be some syndrome. Any experience with this phenomenon?

[bucolic_frolic]

1. That's a boatload of awareness.

Trace today's bad feelings back to their roots in childhood. See in your mind how they evolved over the years, and morphed into your feelings today.

Resolve to compartmentalize them, give them their daily 15 minutes, then put them aside and face the good thoughts for the rest of today. Face them first thing on waking in the morning. Put them in the background.

Talk to yourself. Out loud. Resolve not to be controlled by the negative side. Don't ruminate on them.

[Schlocko]

5. That's some deep childhood.

I was born this way.

[FirstLight]

2. I'm a menopausal woman who just got diagnosed with adhd...

and my awareness of my own "overwhelm" is not fun... Like I can Adult and multi-task like a pro, but then the hyperfocus hits a wall and I realize I've been sitting in the same position for hours and my neck is tight with all the tension of overdoing it!

I also just got through a major life trauma (ex tried to kill me) and I am now doing the deep therapy of seeing my parental/family patterns that brought me here. I am learning how to create boundaries and love myself...but it's a journey. sometimes it's two or three steps forward, and one step back...sometimes it's a "bed day"

I highly suggest working with someone to look at your inner dialog and thoughts/behaviors...even foods that can trigger a downward flow. If not, journaling is also an amazing way to follow your inner dialog and patterns...

Good for you for being self aware

[Schlocko]

3. Thanks.

I’ve known myself most of my life.

[Schlocko]

4. Oh. .

. . and I’m glad you survived your ex’s assault.

[Irish_Dem]

6. This may be break through depression.

If you are on antidepressant medication it is good news, the meds are kicking in.

However you most likely will need to be titrated to a higher dose, or if you
have just started the meds, give it more time.

Talk to your prescribing doc or NP.

[Schlocko]

7. Appointment on Monday.

So I’m taking precautions.

[Irish_Dem]

8. Often antidepressant meds are started at low beginning dose.

Then gradually increased until a therapeutic level is reached.

At a good clinical level you should not have periods of depression and anxiety during the day.
But it very encouraging that you are having periods with depression in remission.

Yes very good you have an appointment, talk to MD or NP about it.

[Schlocko]

10. I can see the appeal

And I would probably enjoy Rogerian therapy if I had the right practitioner. Still . . I’ve never tried extended cognitive or emotional therapy because my family had a bad experience with it. My Dad (RIP) was chronically anxious and depressed, and and the Freudian quack who treated him attributed it to trauma around his mother. (My grandmother, who died when I was three, was apparently not a nice person, but no one has been able to cite any instances of abusive behavior.). That theory messed me up for awhile because whenever I would have a depressive episode, I’d start scanning my memory for unusual or severe trauma and found . . absolutely . .nothing. Which made me feel weak and self-indulgent which only exacerbated the anxiety. Better I should have noticed that if I had a sleepless night or a severe gastrointestinal event, my mood would crater not soon after. Once I did that math, I never felt the need to discuss my feelings with some stranger. I know it helps some people, though.