Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News Editorials & Other Articles General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

no_hypocrisy

(48,628 posts)
Wed Jan 10, 2024, 08:22 AM Jan 2024

Gaslighting.

I've written in prior posts about growing up in a narcissistic family (father, mother, sister).

My sister is the only surviving narcissist and she's still at it. I've removed myself from her life since June 30, 2023.

And I've wondered how come I'm the only one to see the vindictive maliciousness that she readily doles out.

I think I have a clue: a false veneer of empathy and humanitarianism. I took a peek at her FB page. No people. No friends, no family, nobody. But she posts a plethora of helpless, lost, abandoned animals (dogs and cats mostly), asking for help for them. Nobody who loves animals the way she does could possibly disdain others, especially family members.

I get it now.

2 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Gaslighting. (Original Post) no_hypocrisy Jan 2024 OP
Gaslighting is but one abusive technique of narcissism bucolic_frolic Jan 2024 #1
You have now figured out how my mother does it. OldBaldy1701E Jan 2024 #2

bucolic_frolic

(46,740 posts)
1. Gaslighting is but one abusive technique of narcissism
Wed Jan 10, 2024, 08:34 AM
Jan 2024

Families with narcissists also have feeder personalities held in a trauma bond or codependent role. It can take years to climb out of.

OldBaldy1701E

(6,221 posts)
2. You have now figured out how my mother does it.
Thu Jan 11, 2024, 02:54 PM
Jan 2024

You'd think that woman could walk on water if you ask people around the town. All I can do is smile and nod. I mean, she does a lot for the town and they really appreciate it as they are understaffed around there and the stuff she does frees up a lot of resources. (It is an historic town... full of locations that are set up for the tourist trade. She is now handling a lot of the ancillary projects for several locations and that means the staff can do more for the tourists and the general running of each location. It's nitpicky stuff sometimes, but she does have a flair for it. Plus, it brings in more income and more prestige for the town. Hurrah.)

It would have been nice if she had been as interested in putting forth those levels of effort to help her mentally ill child, but hey... prestige, remember?

Latest Discussions»Support Forums»Mental Health Support»Gaslighting.