I don't know what to do.

[OldBaldy1701E]

I am sitting here wondering why I am still sitting here. I have been doing some thinking and researching about what to do instead of sitting here all the time. And, there just is not much coming to mind. This was never an issue in the past. I could always find something to do. But nowadays, anything I used to do is just that, I used to do it. Either because of physical issues or just my mental health, I cannot fathom doing much of anything. I don't want to do anything that people 'my age' seem to want to do, as they all seem to want to do things that require a 'dick waving' amount of money. I don't even have 'so broke I cannot afford to pay attention' money, so I can't do any of that. Plus, I do not have my own transportation anymore since my little truck died. My beloved husband works in the evenings and into the night, which just removes him and our vehicle from any plans. Plus, I just don't know if I have anything to offer anyone who is not a geeky, former performer who cannot do any of it anymore anyway. I mean, I jumped on two different sites that list activities and events for 'seniors' and everything listed looked shallow and boring and everything I did a search for came up empty. I don't get it. Why can't people understand that when one is done, it makes no sense to just sit around and mark time? I just do not get it. And on nights like tonight... with my favorite holiday coming up and a weekend of partying before that holiday even arrives, I just do not understand why anyone would want me to sit here in constant pain and depression for any length of time.

As Spock would no doubt say, it is not logical.

[a kennedy]

1. So sorry, started reading and couldn't anymore, try to put all this into paragraphs.....

Might help others in Reading what you’re going through.

[OAITW r.2.0]

2. I'm 70, fuckin relax

[Karadeniz]

3. We're twins! Foster some bottle babies! Can you take walks? Can you drive

people to doctor appts?

[cachukis]

4. Make a sampler of your life. Or knit. Or make a rug.

Keep your hands moving and the mind will follow.

[viva la]

5. I'm lower-impact than others....

I always find my way back to watching Agatha Christie episodes on Amazon Prime. (I have a really bad memory, so I never remember "who done it". )
And I also have a playlist of music YouTube videos I love, and I watch them one after another, and leave complimentary comments.
Like I said, I'm low-impact. And I only feel "safe" going back to things I've enjoyed before and know I will enjoy again.
But I don't know if anything like that will help this type of ennui-- it sounds like a real existential abyss sort of ennui?

[BootinUp]

6. Sometimes even the smallest amount of physical activity helps me get out of

a rut. It could be walking around a good size room, or standing and doing some stretching movements with arms, waist, leg movements, etc. I turn on some music or something to listen to while excercising. I am trying to increase my excercise a little at a time. I really got into some bad habits during the pandemic. A couple of weeks ago Saturday I had to take my car to get the battery replaced. It was going to be a couple of hours. I went and took a walk around, and slowly picked up the pace as I got into a rythym. The point is not to compare exactly how much I do to anything else at this point, but just to do a little more when I feel like it. If I feel sore or tired I take it easier for a few days. Maybe some meditation or something that helps me relax. I also have worked on improving my diet. This can be a big help I have found as well. Instead of researching, just do something simple without the research.

I'm not very good at this sort of advice but I felt like giving it a shot. Hope you feel better.

One more thought to add. Breathing deeply while doing any of the above also helps.

[BoomaofBandM]

7. I have some health issues that keep me home with limited mobility.

Reading helps me. I immerse myself in books. Money is tight so I read kindle unlimited on my tablet. I don't read anything
Intellectual, just good old fashioned escapism. My husband likes tv. My daughter visits and does puzzles. Is there anything you can do like that? I need to keep my mind distracted at times.

[usonian]

8. I don't go to those "senior" activities.

I got up, took a great sunrise photo, drove to my eye exam, no worse than two years ago and got a sunset on the way back, at the gas station.

Lost a bag with two donuts while taking the photos, honestly, a good thing.

Music might not be your thing, but some houseplants might help. My Mom grew lots of African violets. I took photos of them at the start of my photography hobby, now over 50 years going. Crotons are pretty and make the home look like 🌺 Hawaii! 🌺

Walks help a lot.

Listening to classical music is relaxing and good for the spirit. I play, but that started about the time that Sputnik launched. On and off, mostly off. But my parents' good idea has paid dividends for me.

Try one or more.

Photography has helped me see details around me that most people miss. Even a phone can take beautiful photos of little things that only need a closer look.

[XanaDUer2]

9. Check out free activities at the library eom