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Nikia

(11,411 posts)
Wed Feb 15, 2012, 10:43 AM Feb 2012

What to say at an interview when you left on bad terms?

I have been looking for a job for the past 2 months. I have had multiple interviews but have had no offers. I think that a big part of my lack of success is that I don't have a good response to the question of why I left my previous job.
I resigned but I didn't have much of a choice. Not to go into too much detail, there were many changes going on in the company, a new boss, and demands that I felt were impossible being placed on me. I went from being a stellar employee to being a bad employee and couldn't seem to do anything about it or get any help on what I should be specifically doing differently. Anything that I can say that would be remotely true either sounds really bad on my end or sounds like I'd be trashing my former employer. The answer that I've given so far about there being a lot of changes and stress seems to be the best that I've said so far but it still makes me sound like I can't accept change or stress, which has probably prevented me from getting the jobs.

28 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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What to say at an interview when you left on bad terms? (Original Post) Nikia Feb 2012 OP
Yeah, I'd drop any reference to stress issues and focus on the turmoil... Scuba Feb 2012 #1
+1 dem644555il Mar 2012 #16
Even though... rbnyc Feb 2012 #2
That is probably the best advice I have been given Nikia Feb 2012 #3
Awesome! rbnyc Feb 2012 #4
I would add a couple of points dmallind Feb 2012 #5
Very, very good! rbnyc Feb 2012 #6
I agree fully with the advice from rbnyc; it's excellent. Scuba Mar 2012 #17
Best Response I Have Heard!!! Shemmi21202 Jun 2016 #23
Cool rbnyc Jun 2016 #25
+1. Very good advice. n/t FSogol Jun 2016 #24
Great response EllaJones Aug 2016 #27
So glad... rbnyc Aug 2016 #28
I guess this is why I have been unemployed for over four years! blue ivy schlotsky Feb 2012 #7
It as if they don't understand that some supervisors and/or companies have serious problems Nikia Feb 2012 #9
Update: I got a job Nikia Feb 2012 #8
Excellent and well done. How DID you handle those questions if I may ask? nt dmallind Feb 2012 #10
Okay, help me with this problem. fladem2006 Mar 2012 #11
Aim higher. Chan790 Apr 2012 #20
I mentioned culturual changes within the organization Nikia Mar 2012 #13
Nicely done. Congrats. nt dmallind Mar 2012 #15
Awesome!! rbnyc Mar 2012 #12
I am glad to have this job Nikia Mar 2012 #14
Congratulations!! Scuba Mar 2012 #18
I always say that "the organization decided to move in a new direction and... Chan790 Apr 2012 #19
Just wanted to say this entire thread has been very helpful... cynatnite Jun 2012 #21
same situation gregmoreland Aug 2012 #22
Happened to me I just gave factual account of my side MyNameGoesHere Jun 2016 #26
 

Scuba

(53,475 posts)
1. Yeah, I'd drop any reference to stress issues and focus on the turmoil...
Wed Feb 15, 2012, 11:00 AM
Feb 2012

... at your previous employer. "Impossible demands" might be re-stated as "demands that I compromise my personal ethics" or "demands that were not tolerable from a family perspective".


Good luck. Remember, 80% of success is just showing up.

rbnyc

(17,045 posts)
2. Even though...
Wed Feb 15, 2012, 01:54 PM
Feb 2012

...you say you didn't have much of a choice, I would make it about choice. It's a tough situation to be in. I think if it were me, I would make it about my desire for the right fit - to put myself in the right situation and make myself available for the best opportunities. Maybe I would say something like, "It was my choice to leave the organization. Although it was a risk, there had been a cultural shift within the organization and I felt it was my opportunity to find a better relationship, so to speak. I had to make a choice about my role in the changes that were going on. I didn't feel completely bought in. I think it's very important to be committed to the direction of an organization. It was time to look for a better fit."

If pressed for specifics on "cultural changes" I would try to keep it vague. "There are many ways to run a business and people can disagree without either of them being wrong. It's just a question of perspective and style. I want to avoid being overly critical of my former employers. I still feel a sense of gratitude for my experiences there."

Stay away from anything that seems like there was game-playing or power politics. Don't play the victim.

Hope that helps.

dmallind

(10,437 posts)
5. I would add a couple of points
Fri Feb 17, 2012, 12:09 PM
Feb 2012

1) Keep complaints vague and impersonal without complaining about workload - I found phrases like "inconsistent and ill-defined priorities for my role and the whole department/company" and "absence of any real metrics that defined and incentivized high performance" to be useful. That way they know you were interested in priorities and high performance, and you are blaming the whole systems and processes of the company not "the boss" when you are talking to a person who will hopefully become "the boss", and will probably think they have a better system of metrics and planning.

2) If you are likely to get a poor reference, set this up upfront with again impersonal statements like "the company's way of managing uncertainty and change were not conducive to employee success. Communication was poor and erratic (every employee survey at nigh every company says this) and change, instead of being collaborative and positive as in well-managed companies (never badmouth change itself - nobody wants an inflexible worker), was thrown at the wall in the hope it would stick with no real input from or guidance for those affected. It became a very uncomfortable and unproductive environment filled with conflict".

Need to use your own way of speaking of course, not mine!

Shemmi21202

(1 post)
23. Best Response I Have Heard!!!
Fri Jun 3, 2016, 09:30 AM
Jun 2016

Hands down, this is the best "exit response" I believe, I have ever heard! Thank you, this post and response has helped me tremendously.

 

EllaJones

(20 posts)
27. Great response
Thu Aug 11, 2016, 03:28 AM
Aug 2016

I really like your comment and it helped me because i am going through the same sort f situation.

 
7. I guess this is why I have been unemployed for over four years!
Mon Feb 20, 2012, 02:45 PM
Feb 2012

I am repulsed and appalled by what we are expected to go through to have the "honor" of being able to earn a paycheck

I had a very similar situation: boss left (she was a trip), co-worker became manager, was a total czar (told me that if I ever got sick I needed to let her know in advance ), and I just couldn't handle her lunacy.

So I have to learn how to phrase it so that I (!) don't look bad?!

This whole bunch of crap about what to say during interviews is phony bee ess to me. It's more of a game of gotcha questions than a real opportunity to discover a potential employee's personality to see if it meshes with the company, IMO.

Nikia

(11,411 posts)
9. It as if they don't understand that some supervisors and/or companies have serious problems
Sun Feb 26, 2012, 11:25 AM
Feb 2012

What if potential employees always asked why they had an opening? If the answer was not that the business was expanding or that the previous person got promoted, than the candidate would turn down the job.
I have actually asked the question about what happened to the previous employee when I was interviewing (although not so much this time). Over 75%, the answer was not the favorable one.
Since it is an employer's market right now, I guess that I understand why if they have several good candidates that they might exclude the one(s) that are not still employed and looking for a better position. One of the jobs where I interviewed, though, has been advertising their position for almost 2 months. As far as I could tell, I was qualified. I am thinking that my answer was why I was not hired. Still, it seems that they rather not fill the position for 2 months than take a chance on me who was not leaving my previous company for ideal reasons.
Good luck to you. I wonder how a company would feel if they were unable to hire anyone for 4 years because they did not have the perfect answer to why a previous employee left.

Nikia

(11,411 posts)
8. Update: I got a job
Sun Feb 26, 2012, 11:04 AM
Feb 2012

While it involves a small pay cut, a longer commute, and different hours, I think that the position has potential. It is in different but related industry. I think that, in the long run, it is probably good for my career. I am hoping that if I eventually leave this company that my small resume gap won't be a big deal.
Thank you for the advice.

fladem2006

(17 posts)
11. Okay, help me with this problem.
Sat Mar 3, 2012, 11:46 AM
Mar 2012

I began as a server at a restaurant in a hotel in 2007. The then manager was fired, the assistant manager became manager and she promoted me to hostess which is the assistant manager position. I worked my but off through thick and thin especially the last quarter of last year - 2011 when my boss became very ill. She went into the hospital on Christmas Eve. She had broken her hip. She called and resigned over the phone. I didn't want the job as manager so they brought in someone else. The new manager lasted 2 weeks - it just wasn't her cup of tea. Managed the restaurant for another 2 weeks including a major function for the Chamber of Commerce - 250 guests. Another new manager hired, and the GM of the hotel says for all of my extra effort, she says to take a 3 weeks vacation paid. I take my three weeks. A few days before I am to go back to work, I call to make an appointment with the new restaurant manager and she says that things have changed and I am no longer needed! They have not replaced me, but this is a small town (Winter Park, Florida). I am eligible for unemployment, but I don't know what to tell people.

What do you sugest?

Signed
Need a Job!

 

Chan790

(20,176 posts)
20. Aim higher.
Thu Apr 19, 2012, 06:27 PM
Apr 2012

I'm guessing you're looking at non-prestigious restaurant jobs, most people look for the first attainable job they can find. With that resume you should be looking at the leader restaurants in your area, I say that with a brother who is a restaurant manager and another who is a chef...both are historically-reticent to hire new hires they don't know whose pedigree is "too good" because they have trouble hanging onto them. Nobody wants to hire an Asst. Mgr., Host or Server who could be working someplace they could make more money because eventually they will.

Specifically look and target the big-name, big-ticket restaurants in your town, that's where you're most likely to be able to make a career.

Get a letter of reference from your old long-time boss. She probably knows the big fish in your area and may even be able to refer you to someone for an opening that's not even public yet.

Universities. I used to work in campus programs for a college, part of my job was campus events planning which included coordinating catering with dining services. Let me tell you, they can't get decent applicants for host/coordinator positions for special-event catering. People who have the skills to do the job tend to be people locked into thinking "restaurant" when they need to make a career change. It's nearly always days and early evening. It's front-of-house and mostly client-relations, also talking to the client and the catering manager or chef to determine a menu, operations (that might include linen-service and decor occasionally), smoothing out the ruffled feathers and holding it together when something goes wrong. (Rarely you are also the catering manager.) It pays well, it pays very well in fact and the people who excel at it have tremendous upward mobility...many end up leaving to manage events for conventions and hotels. It's like running a dining room except there's only one seating and you might have 50-500 patrons. (If you want to go back to college, there's also the added benefit that as a university employee many schools offer P/T free tuition.)

Nikia

(11,411 posts)
13. I mentioned culturual changes within the organization
Mon Mar 5, 2012, 10:33 AM
Mar 2012

I also mentioned that while I was employed that it was difficult to devote my time to a job search.

Nikia

(11,411 posts)
14. I am glad to have this job
Mon Mar 5, 2012, 10:42 AM
Mar 2012

Although I had also passed the phone screen of a more prestigious company for a position that paid more. I did have doubts that I would make it all the way to getting hired for that position though, especially since I didn't really feel qualified.

 

Chan790

(20,176 posts)
19. I always say that "the organization decided to move in a new direction and...
Thu Apr 19, 2012, 05:43 PM
Apr 2012

I was no longer useful to them in that new direction so we mutually parted."

The previous employer was a bank, I turned them in for mortgage fraud so they made up an excuse to fire me because I got two senior VPs fired, one of them arrested and instigated an investigation by regulators. I took it to court, won and got them to commit provable perjury. Awesome, yes...but there is no way in hell I'm ever telling any future employer that, especially since I also sent my previous supervisor (in a retail chain) to prison for grand larceny.

I've had a history of working for some bad people; all I want to is to be a communications associate for an NPO, can't get anybody to call me on my resume despite years of high-level volunteer positions in that role and more training than most people working in that field.

cynatnite

(31,011 posts)
21. Just wanted to say this entire thread has been very helpful...
Fri Jun 8, 2012, 08:38 AM
Jun 2012

I too was hired by one supervisor, had a stellar work record and after she took another job offer, her subordinate took her position. Then it went downhill very quickly. The supervisor was out of the office, rarely took calls or emails, and I went to a subpar employee. I was taken out of the office I had been working at and moved to another one out of town. I was told it would take 2 weeks to prepare my space, but when I arrived they had nothing for me except a small cubicle that wasn't even a desk. The supervisor then told me I should not expect any movement career wise and that I had no future. It wasn't a firing...it was telling me that I was not welcome at the company. It was humiliating and a kick to the gut. She didn't give me a choice and she knew it.

I try not to be bitter. I liked the company overall, but she put me in an untenable position.

gregmoreland

(2 posts)
22. same situation
Thu Aug 30, 2012, 01:10 PM
Aug 2012

i am in the same situation right now and i have decided that when i go in for an interview i am just going to be honest and tell them that it didn't end the way i wished it had and inform them that if they do decide to contact my ex-employer that i would like a chance to respond to any claims they might make. if they ask me to go into detail about the situation, i will, giving them an honest account. i have also considered asking the potential employer, before going any further in the application process, what their political and/or religious stances are (it's not illegal for the employee to ask this). i have had a lot of bad experiences with conservative and/or faux-religious employers.

 

MyNameGoesHere

(7,638 posts)
26. Happened to me I just gave factual account of my side
Sat Jun 4, 2016, 09:38 AM
Jun 2016

Of events. Some understand and others didn't say anything. I still got a job. Basic rule of interviewing, don't deflect, don't lie, don't embellish.

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