Is he dead yet?

[Orrex]

Pecked to death by a defunded Big Bird?

Politely questioned to death by a defunded Terry Gross?

Accidentally shot by 6,600 soldiers?

[SocialDemocrat61]

1. Pissed off Melaina

And she stabbed him in the eye with a high heel.

[SheltieLover]

2. Mistaken for a rabid species by lil marco during a psychotic split due to stressors of 4 job titles.

Deported to El Salvadore prison for domestic terrorism.

Taken out by pootin out of jealousy over mineral rights deal.

Hope springs eternal...

[twodogsbarking]

3. Death by ass kissing.

[Martin Eden]

4. Toxic overdose of orange makeup on his face

Mixed with the urine of Russian prostitutes.

[C_U_L8R]

5. Chronic constipation

During autopsy, pathologists discovered the entire Trump cabinet (Vance, Bondi, Lutnick, Segeth, Rubio and the rest) were so firmly crammed up the deceased President's anus that no hamberder could pass.

[SheltieLover]

14. Bazinga!!!

[malaise]

6. No but dementia Donvict doesn't know the difference between Harlem and Harvard

https://www.democraticunderground.com/100220286254

[Iris]

7. Moved into a trash can that was dumped into a landfill

[Emile]

8. Soviet-era spacecraft falling from space lands

right on top of his head.

[surfered]

9. Struck by falling Soviet era spacecraft. What were the odds?

[NNadir]

11. Poisoned by the ghost of Eva Braun?

[niyad]

10. Alas, my bottle of bubbly remains unopened.

Still, the day is yet young. One dares to dream.

[LudwigPastorius]

12. Tickled to death by Elmo*?

* the muppet, not the South African Nazi

[sop]

13. No, a confused Trump didn't scream out "War Eagle!" thinking he was giving Auburn's commencement address.

Yelling "War Eagle!" is fightin' words for folks at the University of Alabama.

[Sharma Dreihund]

15. By a collective of hungry caterpillars?

https://www.sciencenews.org/article/caterpillar-wears-body-part-insect-prey

[malaise]

17. Welcome to DU

😀

[republianmushroom]

16. Not yet today, but, the day is not over so there still is HOPE.

Really don't care how Lord just do it.

[LetMyPeopleVote]

18. One of these days we're going to wake up and,...

Link to tweet