Vladimir Putin wants Russians to have sex during work breaks to boost population

[DJ Synikus Makisimus]

Source: India Today
https://www.indiatoday.in/world/story/russian-sex-at-work-vladimir-putin-moscow-birth-rate-decline-kremlin-ukraine-war-2600847-2024-09-16

"Russian President Vladimir Putin has reportedly advised Russians to have sex at work, during their lunch and coffee breaks, in an effort to combat the country's declining birth rate. According to a report in Metro, Putin's directive comes as Russia's current fertility rate stands at approximately 1.5 children per woman, well below the 2.1 needed for population stability. The country's population has also taken a dip due to the ongoing war with Ukraine, which has led to an exodus of over a million, mostly young, Russians.

Russian Health Minister Dr Yevgeny Shestopalov emphasised that work should not be an obstacle to procreation, urging Russians to take advantage of lunch and coffee breaks for family expansion. 'Being very busy at work is not a valid reason, but a lame excuse. You can engage in procreation during breaks, because life flies by too quickly,' Metro quoted Shestopalov as saying.

Russia has recorded its lowest birth rate in 25 years for the first half of 2024, according to official data released earlier this month. The figures also revealed that in June, births dropped below one lakh for the first time, marking a significant decline. 'This is catastrophic for the future of the nation,' Kremlin spokesperson Dmitry Peskov said in July, "


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While most Western sources have scoffed at the figures, Ukraine's Defense Ministry claims to have killed over 600,000 soldiers fighting for the Russian Federation. Rates for wounded have hovered around three times that figure, while prisoners wishing to return to the Russian Federation are exchanged whenever possible. Also, Russia's birth rate was low before the war and seems to have gotten worse, understandably,

The population of the Russian Federation is about 146 million, of which about 72% are ethnic Russians. As a Russian ethnonationalist, it's the ethnic Russians who Putin is addressing.

Question: Does a Russian male successfully procreating during a coffee break make him a 'minute man?'

[Jirel]

1. Translation:

“I need cannon fodder, and I need it now!!!”

Dirtbag.

[sarisataka]

9. There is a bit of a lag on getting the cannon fodder

approximately 19 years, though you can shave off up to a dozen years if one is not concerned with quality of said cannon fodder

[rzemanfl]

2. Any co-worker? Damn, that sounds like the seventies here.

Except for the procreation part.

[unblock]

3. I don't drink coffee and have never been inside a Starbucks. But I think I now understand how they can charge so much!

Apparently I've been missing a key component of coffee breaks!

[HelpImSurrounded]

4. The failure of capitalism

It can not function without a constantly growing population.

[Jerry2144]

5. It gives new meaning to getting screwed at work

By your boss

[DaBronx]

29. This made

Me burst out laughing. If I had taken a sip of something, surely it would have exited through my nose!

[Jerry2144]

32. I refrained myself from saying

I got f ucked over for a promotion. Because I’m a good person

[brush]

6. No mention of who's gonna pay for these kids?

Come on, Pootie, you've got billions stashed away. You're not getting any younger...and even you can't take it with you because She's black and won't look kindly upon it.

[DJ Synikus Makisimus]

26. Actually they have announced some incentives.

Medical care is considered a right in the Russian Federation, though the quality of care varies widely, both regionally, ethnically and on a class basis. Putin has announced renewed efforts for maternal care, both pre- and post-pregnancy. Some regional governments have announced cash incentives for having children as well. Like so many things in Russia, however, the difference between the announcement and reality can be rather stark.

[yagotme]

7. Exodus, as leaving, or taking a dirt nap?

also taken a dip due to the ongoing war with Ukraine, which has led to an exodus of over a million,

[sarisataka]

13. I have met several Ukrainians of what we in the US would consider "military age"

who have left their country. They are quite open that it is to avoid the possibility of military service. They worry Ukraine will lower the draft age from the current limit of 25, or they are getting close to their 25th birthday.

[rainin]

8. I imagine there's not much room for women to refuse consent. If Putin wants babies, he's going to get babies.

[tanyev]

10. Just look at the ceiling and think of Mother Russia, ladies.

[CousinIT]

11. Don't give the MAGAs any ideas.

Too late, he likely already did.

[dalton99a]

12. Cut out the vodka

[sarisataka]

14. Wouldn't vodka help in this case?

[Zambero]

18. Inclination?

Perhaps. Performance? Doubtful.

[sarisataka]

20. So a mental inclination but

a physical declination?

[Zambero]

34. More or less

Likely LESS.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

37. Shakespeare said it best:

Therefore, much drink may be said to be an equivocator with lechery.
It makes him, and it mars him;
it sets him on, and it takes him off;
it persuades him, and disheartens him;
makes him stand to, and not stand to
— in conclusion, equivocates him in a sleep and, giving him the lie, leaves him.

Macbeth Act 2, Scene 3; the Porter

[GopherGal]

23. For the men or the women?

Probably wouldn't help the male performance much.

Might help women forget about the creep on top of them and the lack of protection.

[Lovie777]

15. If this does not sound like the GQP here in the USA....................

[Bmoboy]

16. Running out of cannon fodder

[Lochloosa]

17. Never underestimate the value of a good nap or coffee break.

[eppur_se_muova]

19. Answers the question: Who hates childless cat women more than JD Vance ?

"Breed for the good of the State" is the same message from all the authoritarians. It's tragically outdated thinking.

[sarisataka]

24. Cross of Honour of the German Mother

Cross of Honour of the German Mother

The Cross of Honour of the German Mother (German: Ehrenkreuz der Deutschen Mutter), referred to colloquially as the Mutterehrenkreuz (Mother's Cross of Honour) or simply Mutterkreuz (Mother's Cross), was a state decoration conferred by the government of Nazi Germany[1][2] to honour a German-citizen mother for exceptional merit to the German nation.[2][3][4] Eligibility later extended to include ethnic German (‘Volksdeutsche’) mothers from, for example, Austria and Sudetenland, that had earlier been incorporated into the German Reich.[4]

The decoration was conferred from 1939 until 1945[5] in three classes: bronze, silver, and gold,[2][6] to Reichsdeutsche mothers who exhibited probity, exemplary motherhood, and who conceived and raised at least four children in the role of a parent.[7][8] A similar practice, that continues to this present day, was already established in France since 1920, by conferring the Médaille de la Famille française (Medal of the French Family), a tribute to the French mother who raised several children appropriately.

The Soviets had their own version
Order of Maternal Glory

The Order of Maternal Glory (Russian: Орден «Материнская слава», romanized: Orden "Materinskaya slava&quot was a Soviet civilian award commemorating mothers with a substantial number of children, created on 8 July 1944 by Joseph Stalin and established with a decision of the Presidium of Supreme Soviet of the USSR. Its status was confirmed by the Soviet's decision of 18 August 1944 and later modified by 16 September 1947, 28 May 1973 and 28 May 1980 decisions. It was awarded on behalf of the Presidium of the Supreme Soviet of the USSR through decrees of local Soviet presidencies.[1]

Classes
The order was divided into three classes: first, second and third class.

It was conferred to:

First class: mothers bearing and raising nine children.
Second class: mothers bearing and raising eight children.
Third class: mothers bearing and raising seven children.

The order was conferred upon the first birthday of the last child, provided that the other children necessary to reach the qualifying number (natural or adopted) remained alive. Children who had perished under heroic, military or other respectful circumstances, including occupational diseases, were also counted. The award was created simultaneously with the Mother Heroine (Russian: Мать-героиня order and the Maternity Medal (Russian: Медаль материнства and it was situated in between them. The author of the art project was Ivan Dubasov, then head artist of Goznak.

[DJ Synikus Makisimus]

30. Yeah, those were the first things that came to my mind.

Thought it best to stay on-topic and keep it short, though. Thanks for posting that!

[myohmy2]

21. if...

...he would stop killing russians in needless wars there wouldn't be as great a shortage...

...I wonder if we could get that written into our contract as a fringe benefit...?

...interesting...

[travelingthrulife]

22. Gotta staff those forever wars.

n/t

[Solly Mack]

25. Guess we know what will be filling the blinis this year.

Yes, I know. Crass.

You're welcome.

[RockRaven]

27. Of all the factors dragging down Russia's birth rate, insufficient boinking is

hardly a primary culprit.

[surfered]

28. The grinder needs more meat. The monster is losing about 1,300 soldiers per day.

And he really doesn’t care. Sounds like Trump.

[Mysterian]

31. And Putin can go fuck himself

When will the Russian people rise up and end the insanity? Do they have the courage?

[Kaleva]

33. Russia here I cum!

[struggle4progress]

35. Vlad must need George Costanza's vote

[haele]

36. Hmmm. Isn't Putin's party pushing to have women to leave the workforce

To raise traditional Russian Orthodox families?
So, how is this going to work?

Will married Russian men and women be allowed to go home during lunch for a conjugal visit?

Will Russian men allowed hook up with random co-worker Russian woman in the supply closet, whether they're married to each other or not? Or whether she's willing or not?

Or maybe the government will recruit healthy single young Russian women to become a Russian form of Bund Duetscher Madel to go to these workplaces that are majority male to become impregnated?

I see a lot of potential for workplace rape in the name of "patriotism".

Haele

[tanyev]

38. Yes. If it's not an outright green light to rape female coworkers,

it certainly may be interpreted as such by those who are so inclined.

[jmowreader]

39. Sex breaks would definitely improve workplace morale

Given that, I think it'd be a little uncomfortable to have sex at work.

[Emrys]

40. Pah. Why restrict it to breaks and lunchtime?

Multitask, tovarichi, multitask!

[RidinWithHarris]

41. I sure wouldn't trust buying Russian condoms

Vlad's probably making sure they break or have holes in them.

[Renew Deal]

42. Does your partner have to work with you or are you supposed to find the closest

Fertile person with a break at the same time?

[Chakaconcarne]

43. Do that many couples actually work together in Russia or is this encouraging adultery/cheating?

[lostnfound]

46. Don't think he cares if they are couples

Just the whole burden falling on the women.
Maybe if Putin hadn’t oppressed the bravest and strongest, women would be more interested in carrying on

[Xolodno]

44. Now that's a benefit I can mount.

I'll show myself out now.

[LudwigPastorius]

45. If that's what you want, Vlad, you're going to need a LOT more vodka.